November 3, 2014

Living In The Moment: Let The GIF Go


In the midst of my most recent late-night rummage through the internets, I stumbled across the following animated GIF on Imgur:

This reverse Jaws scenario plays out in a wonderfully absurd fashion that appealed to my sleep-deprived sense of humor perfectly. Of course, I immediately slid the cursor over to the image to hit "save as." A sudden moment of clarity fell upon me before finishing the act however. I thought back to the thousands upon thousands of other lulztastic animated GIFs I've downloaded over the years. I must have gigabytes on top of gigabytes of them at this point. And for what?

November 2, 2014

Sprite Zero Cranberry Review

Yes, I am contractually obligated to have all my sodas blessed by early 90s X-Men Artwork.

Hello and welcome back to Castle Soda-Skull, where we review fizzy soft-drinks up and down and all around. On our last installment, we assaulted your face with a look at the new Mountain Dew Game Fuel Lemonade. We're still (and always) feeling a bit fruity, so let's dive into a can of Sprite Zero Cranberry and see what's what.

This oh-so-festive flavor apparently debuted in 2013 but it's new to me! Sprite Cranberry is clearly an attempt to take the wind out of Pepsi's sails by directly challenging the ever-popular Sierra Mist Cranberry Splash. I actually don't like that particular beverage at all, so checking out the competing version was quite a risk. Ever the daredevil, I heightened the stakes even further by opting for the diet version. (Real talk? I've hit a wonderfully bodacious level of body curvature that I wish to maintain, so I'm taking it easy on the high fructose corn syrup.)

Alright, enough flowery meandering! I'm sure you're all just dying to know my thoughts on the taste of this "other natural flavor"-fueled cranberry concoction. Enjoy a closeup of the can's amazingly simplistic logo whilst preparing yourself for the truths I'm about to drop.

November 1, 2014

Mountain Dew Game Fuel Lemonade Review

Do the eww?

Despite a lackluster experience with the mass-release of Baja Blast, I've just given in to yet another Mountain Dew flavor. Their latest vidya games tie-in promotion has delivered the new Game Fuel Lemonade, and I wasn't able to resist its alluring yellow glow. I enjoy both "Dew" and lemonade alike, so what could go wrong?

October 31, 2014

Halloween Costumes of 2014 Showcase

As Halloween unfortunately draws to a close, it seems fitting to go out by highlighting some of this year's awesome costumes. The dedication it takes to pull this stuff off makes every single repost very much deserved, so please excuse me while I join in on the fun. Vicarious dress up frenzy, engage!

Adam and Barbara from Beetlejuice (source)

October 30, 2014

The Best Halloween Costume I Ever Had


Yes, that was me rocking a store-bought Spider-Man Halloween costume at some point in the late 80s or early 90s. Spidey was my favorite comic character at the time, so of course it was a thrill being able to masquerade as him in exchange for Tootsie Rolls and Skittles for a night. Even so, I can confidently say that this was not as good as it would get.

I'm pretty sure I was 9 years old the last time I actually went trick-or-treating, and it was very much a last minute affair. My mother and I were unexpectedly invited to tag along with my aunt and her step-kids early in the evening. With no other plans in place, we were happy to accept.

October 19, 2014

5 Of The Freakiest Original Ninja Turtle Action Figures

Let's be friends.

Most people around my age are likely to have had great fun with the original run of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles action figures. Given the series' overarching theme of mutation, Playmates was able to fill its toyline with all sorts of oddballs and monsters. Looking back, some of the releases were straight up disturbing. Let's stroll through memory lane and take a look at 5 of the freakiest oldschool TMNT toys!

Baxter Stockman

At face value, wickedly winged scientist Baxter Stockman is actually rather creepy. That grin is nothing short of unsettling.

October 18, 2014

10 Transformers You Should Display For Halloween

Even if they don't realize it, Transformer collectors likely have all the makings of an exceptional Dinosaur Dracula-style Halloween mood table. The core concept behind the TF series already falls right in line with the holiday, and the evolution and experimentation of its toylines has delivered plenty of spooky/scary bots over the years. If I were to assemble a Halloween-friendly Transformers display of my own, it would absolutely have to include the following:

Generation 1 Punch/Counterpunch

Autobot double agent Punch is able to transform into Counterpunch: a completely different persona that the Decepticons foolishly accept among their ranks. It's like the ultimate Halloween costume contest.

October 16, 2014

2014's Monster Cereals Have Absurdly Multilayered Appeal

Given their two-month-per-year sales window, General Mills doesn't need to get overly fancy with the packaging of their Monster Cereals. I'm pretty sure plain white boxes with the names scribbled on in Sharpie would sell just fine. Even so, they really went for the throat this year.

October 14, 2014

Greg Capullo's Batman #36 Cover Is Pure Nightmare Fuel

'Sup. I'm about to eat your soul.

I don't know about you, but I find the cover of the upcoming Batman #36 quite disturbing.

Naturally, illustrator Greg Capullo has a wealth of experience in the realm of the hellish and horrific given his many years of work on the Spawn franchise. When your story calls for casting one of the most heroic of all superheros in a creepy light, I can think of no one better to make that happen. Just look at those eyes, man. Yeesh.

October 12, 2014

Snowflake Cheez-Its: Christmas Infiltrates Halloween Yet Again

I'm not mad. I'm just disappointed.

Everyone's heard the horror stories of Christmas music blaring in Walgreens and CVS stores as early as August. I've always assumed these accounts might be exaggerated, but signs of the holly and jolly do tend to turn up a bit earlier than I'd like. This year, the first blow was dealt by none other than Cheez-It crackers. Out of nowhere, I noticed the normal stock had been replaced by packages drowning in snowflakes.

Come on, man. It's not even past Halloween yet!